Requisites For Change
[00:00:24] We are going to have a great time talking about change. Some people love and embrace change, and others are afraid of change and avoid it as if it could be the plague. The reality is that we're always going through change. Change is a routine, normal part of life, and once we learn why behind change and the positive implications that come with it, we can embrace change and allow it to help us grow and improve on a personal and professional level.
[00:00:53] Whether we're working toward making our lives better or pursuing a goal to make a difference in our communities, or maybe we're
[00:01:00] having a challenging season, and attempting to just make it day to day, embracing change, and working with it is the key to making progress. Here's the reality. Purposeful change can be difficult to achieve.
[00:01:14] It takes a lot of commitment, discipline, and perseverance. In fact, most attempts to make changes end up falling short. Let's talk about why that happens so often and what does it take to create lasting, purposeful, positive change. Yeah, I think it's really exciting to think about the progress and all the improvements that can come from when you're making change in your life.
[00:01:38] But let's face it, change can really be tough to accomplish. I agree with you a hundred percent. It requires commitment, discipline, and perseverance. Just like you said. Sometimes it can be tough to stick with change and just see it all the way through. Like you said, research shows that many efforts that people put forth to make change, they just [00:02:00] don't end up working out like they planned.
[00:02:03] How can we make sure that we achieve the change that we're looking for? I know this is what's on your mind, what you're thinking about, but don't worry. We're here to help. In this podcast, we're gonna go over three things that are important. For making change happen successfully. This is whether you're working with yourself or you're working with a client.
[00:02:21] We call these the three requisites for change. Let's go ahead and dive in by talking about the first requisite. The first one for change is clearing up anything that's holding you back from having what you want. These blocks could come in the form of limiting beliefs, limiting decisions, negative emotions, or internal conflicts.
[00:02:44] There are a lot of possibilities. These are the four that we see the most whenever we're working with clients. We all have big dreams. We all have big goals, and sometimes it just feels like we're not making any progress, and it's really okay to feel this way. It happens to everybody at some point in our lives.
[00:03:02] Maybe you want to start your own business or you looking for your soulmate out there, or you just wanna have more happiness and peace in your life. Sometimes you or your clients might find yourself stuck in habits and behaviors that you just wish you could change, and it's important to know that everybody deals with those struggles.
[00:03:21] It's totally normal, and the great news is it's totally changeable. And one of the big reasons that we struggle with change, it has to do with emotional baggage. When we experience significant emotional events in our life. It is like we create this suitcase of bricks and then we just carry this around with us all the time.
[00:03:43] Every emotional event adds one more brick to the suitcase. Then when something triggers us, it could be a person, it could be a place, it could be an event. That suitcase, poof, it just appears right out of nowhere, right there in our face, in our situation, and we have a choice in that moment. We can either deal with it.
[00:04:05] By deal with it. I mean resolve it, or we can repress it and push it back. Theoretically, adding another heavy brick to the suitcase is what you're doing whenever you're pushing it back and holding it in. Let's be real ignoring it certainly doesn't solve anything, and without the tools or the resources to resolve it, you just end up adding another brick to your baggage.
[00:04:30] This is knowing that at some point your baggage is going to be just too much to handle on your own. Wow. That creates such a powerful image for me, Dan. And everything you've said is so true. As you were saying that I pictured my bricks in my imaginary backpack, and no matter what we carry our bricks in or a baggage in, you're right about something.
[00:04:52] There are so many ways we all ignore those bricks until they start to get heavy on our heart or on our shoulders.
[00:05:00] In the moment, we make conscious decisions to just put the brick in the bag instead of resolve the issue and then get rid of the brick because we think it's the easier way to handle. Many people, myself included at times, end up distracting themselves with work, taking part in some retail therapy sometimes, or try to numb the weight or the pain with various vices, whether it be harmful substances, alcohol abuse, overeating, binge watching tv.
[00:05:29] Some people are excessive workaholics or some people go on social media binges. Everyone has a go-to vice that we just need to learn to identify. That's so true. We even noticed that some of our clients come to us living with this baggage so regularly that they begin to identify with it like it's a part of who they are, and you've probably seen this with people that you know or maybe identify.
[00:05:55] That to be kind of maybe a part of yourself. Sometimes [00:06:00] these people, they seem to be defined by their emotional baggage. It's like they wear this badge of honor around their neck and it becomes part of their identity. And when we realize this in session, the first thing we do is let them know, Hey, your past does not define you, and your past does not have to equal your future.
[00:06:20] Through coaching, they learn. That they're not their emotional baggage and they're very capable of growing beyond it. We talk about learnings a lot because it's so important to what we do and the impact we strive to have, and learning that the past doesn't define us and it doesn't equal our future is powerful and I start to see lives change when this belief takes root in people is so important to eliminate limiting beliefs, negative emotions in these internal conflicts.
[00:06:51] And it's not that difficult to do. If you're looking for resources to help you say goodbye to your limiting beliefs, you're gonna love the free resources that [00:07:00] we put together for you. If you go out to Destiny rising.net/limiting beliefs and download our free book. It is breaking through. Limiting Beliefs is an awesome resource.
[00:07:14] I'll put it in the link in the podcast notes. The Breaking Limiting Beliefs ebook is a great resource if our listeners don't know this yet. I'm unbelievably passionate about the power of N L P, not only because it gives me the tools and the resources to pursue my dreams of making a positive difference in others, but also because it's had such a profound impact on me personally.
[00:07:38] That's a story for another time, and I think you would agree, Dan. When people hear my story, I believe it will help them understand why I'll never stop talking to people about being open to and embracing change. It won't just cause one small change. It has the potential to cause life changing behaviors that affect all areas of our lives.
[00:07:59] [00:08:00] When I went through N L P training, I fell in love with change and the possibilities of change that the various techniques allowed me to experience. As coaches, we all have our favorite techniques when it comes to working with myself and my clients on limiting beliefs or decisions that we need to eliminate and any internal conflicts.
[00:08:20] My absolute favorite is something called Time, T I m E, techniques. To be honest, it's not only my favorite. It might be the most powerful resource I use with my clients because of the immediate, powerful change they experience. I love training coaches on everything in our N L P tool bag, and I think time techniques may be my fave.
[00:08:42] I just love the outcomes. Let's talk about making those changes and what to do with that suitcase of bricks. There are times when people just don't want to admit how those bricks got in their suitcase. They put them there, but you all know people who blame [00:09:00] others for putting those bricks in their suitcase.
[00:09:02] I. Unfortunately, we live in a society right now where the vast majority of people honestly believe that their suitcase is full because others keep putting bricks in their bag. We have a great way of explaining this in our coaching. It's called calls versus effect, and this is exactly why the second requisite is so important.
[00:09:23] The second requisite for change is just that it's cause versus effect or the effect of being at cause. Which is what we titled our ebook. It's another free resource that we put together for you. I strongly encourage you to go out and download it as soon as you're finished with this podcast. Being at calls in your life means that you take full and complete responsibility for your own thoughts, feelings, and actions when you're at cause.
[00:09:51] You're in control of your own life and you don't blame others for your circumstances. And a cause means you understand that your thoughts and your [00:10:00] actions have a direct impact on the outcomes that you experience. Being at cause means that you understand that where you are in life right now is a sum total of all your conscious and unconscious decisions that you've made up until this point.
[00:10:16] Oh, I'm a little jealous. You're making so many good points in this podcast. I agree with you 100%. When we stop letting external factors dictate our happiness and successes, it's only then that we begin to understand that we create our own reality through the thoughts that we choose, the language that we use, the decisions we make, and the actions we take.
[00:10:41] Being at cause Also means having a growth mindset when we move from effect or blaming others for everything that goes wrong. We begin to see challenges as opportunities for growth, and we then have the energy and the confidence and the mindset to persist chasing our dreams. I [00:11:00] know when I first adopted the at cause mindset, I began to persist in the face of obstacles and even still when I make mistakes now, and yes, of course, I still do that often.
[00:11:11] I'm human. But now I collect these learnings from those mistakes, and I apply them in my life so that I can avoid making the same mistakes over and over and over. When we take ownership of our lives and make conscious decisions that align with our values and our goals, we become the creators of our own destinies, and we can achieve anything we set our minds to achieve.
[00:11:35] I believe that, and now I live that every single day. Dan mentioned our ebook earlier, the Effect of Being At Cause. It's another great resource you can find easily on our website. Just go out to destiny rising.net and you'll see this book Under Resources. Being at Cause is the Foundation for All Lasting Change.
[00:11:57] Make sure that you take advantage of this free [00:12:00] resource. Okay, so quick recap. The first Requisite for Change is to release or clear up anything that's holding you back. The second requisite for change is to be at cause. And the third requisite for change is to take monumental action toward what you want.
[00:12:17] What is monumental action? Well, we have an entire podcast dedicated to monumental action and digging deeper into how important it is for making change for today's discussion. Think about the word monumental. It's not small. Have you ever seen a monument that was small and insignificant? Me neither.
[00:12:40] Monuments are big. They're important, and they demand respect. When action is monumental, it's like a monument. Big, important and worthy of being remembered. Just like the Statue of Liberty, the Washington Monument, Mount Rushmore, I mean, think of some of these monuments, [00:13:00] the pyramids of Egypt, the Taj Mahal.
[00:13:03] Are you starting to see, feel, and hear what I'm talking about? Taking tremendous, monumental action. It's so important. Monumental action is all about having the courage and the determination to achieve great things and to make huge, significant changes in your life. It means stepping outta your comfort zone and taking calculated risks that can and will lead to amazing results.
[00:13:31] It's not just about making these little small tweaks to things like your schedule or cutting back on the little thing here or there. It's about embracing new ideas and having new approaches that challenge your norms. Wow. Dan, you are so good at storytelling. It's crazy. As you were talking, I could see these huge, massive monuments in my mind.
[00:13:56] I actually went back and remembered what it felt like to [00:14:00] stand and see some of these things in the distance and what it felt like to get so close that I couldn't even take the entire monument into view because it was well monumental. So thank you for giving us that so, so good. As we are thinking about this, I think we all agree it can be easy to get caught up in thinking about what we don't want or what we want to avoid.
[00:14:23] Thinking about it in the way you just described helps us see that our thinking can be and is what holds us back. I challenge myself and anyone else listening now to change our mindset and our thinking. Let's use monumental action to go after the things we want to go after our goals and our dreams. Hey, and you know, as you're working toward change, it's important to keep your eyes on the prize.
[00:14:49] Maintaining focus on your end goal gives you the drive and the determination that you need to keep pushing forward. Even when things seem a little bit tough, I think it's important to make a [00:15:00] habit of reminding yourself of the desired outcome and all the reasons why you wanted to make the change in the first place.
[00:15:07] This way, you won't let short-term setbacks or temptations divert you or throw you off course from your long-term goals. These things that you really know you want to achieve. It won't always be easy, and keeping your end goal in mind is key to achieving success in your personal and your professional life.
[00:15:27] When we talk about that specific focus toward a goal, I think a lot of people miss out on getting what they want because they keep switching between thoughts of wanting it and not wanting it, even if we don't realize it. This sends out a mixed signal to your unconscious mind that you're not sure what you want.
[00:15:47] The key action here is to make sure to keep your focus on what you truly want. Have you ever heard the saying, be careful what you wish for? Mm-hmm. Well, it's true. Your unconscious mind [00:16:00] is always listening and ready to deliver exactly what you ask for. Take some time to really think about what you want and be as specific as possible as you set your motivated action towards your goal.
[00:16:14] You'll be surprised at how quickly your unconscious mind starts working toward it. Remember, your unconscious mind is always working for you. I want you to be happy and fulfilled in all areas of your life. Don't be afraid to ask for what you want and trust that it will come to you in the perfect way and at the perfect time to wrap things up. [00:16:34] If you want to make a positive change in your life, in your coaching business, in any other business in your organization. Pretty much anywhere in your life there are three requisites for change. One is release or clear up anything that's holding you back. Two, learn to be at cause in every situation. And number three, take monumental action toward what you [00:17:00] want.
[00:17:01] Without these requisites, your efforts may not get as far as you would like. And if you focus on these requisites, they'll pave a smooth path for achieving the outcomes of your dreams. Hmm. So, so good. Alright folks, that's all for today's podcast. At the end of each podcast, we always like to ask you to do two things.
[00:17:23] First, if you haven't already done so, hit subscribe so you never miss a Destiny Rising Podcast. And second, share this podcast with someone you think would benefit from hearing it. This helps us help as many people as possible. And until next time, live your best. See you soon.